Let me start by saying this is not the post I was prepared to publish today.  Pommes Anna was the post I was going share today.  However, as I guess you can imagine (because so many of you are just like me) I am known as the goat lady….the chicken lady….those are children.  I think it’s sweet and cute.  I rather like it.

I have over the years however, come across more than a few woman who seem to judge me harshly for the way I live my life and raise my kids.  Usually, I ignore them as who cares what other people think….(to a point). However, people have come to know me…not because I am special or anything like that but because I am so very different.  Now please realize that by regular standards I am different.  I do realize it.  What I didn’t realize was that so many think I am different in a negative way.

I am being told that my dedication to home-keeping is a waste of time.  That I am setting woman back 50 years….I’m being asked questions like “don’t you just get bored?”  Don’t you miss “actual” stimulation from the “real” world?  Why do I feel I need to be my husband’s slave?  My favorite though is “why don’t I just get a hobby?”

I am told that by spending so much time on the care of my family I am being a mother hen…that my kids will never find a way to be independent….I am told that by cooking dinner for my family every night I am being silly because food can be purchased and then I would have time for myself to I guess “get a hobby”.

I am a very nice person (mostly).  I mean I do have a very sarcastic sense of humor but it’s truly all in good fun and I share it only with my close friends and family.  Who know they mean more to me than my own life.  Now….I have heard about all of this kind of thing that I can take.  I found myself today really angry.  So I finally responded instead of excusing myself and walking away.  I said that I look after my family with the dedication that I do because I can’t for a moment think of anywhere else I would rather be.  I am confident that while you may think me a mother hen, my children will leave my home someday with all the skills they need to be completely self-sufficient people.  Even at the ages that my kids are (10 and 3) they are well aware that instant food is not for “us”.  They don’t ask for it….they don’t expect it…it’s not an issue in our home.

Please understand, I have no issue what-so-ever with a woman who works outside her home be it by choice or need.  We are free people after all.  I have never walked up to a woman and told her she was neglecting her kids by going to work….that freezer section lasagna was not suitable dinner for a child….or any other rude comment I could come up with.  Why is it ok to be so judgmental of a stay at home mom but considered rude to treat a working mom the same way?  I can tell you that my Mother did not raise me to treat people with such disrespect.  I pass that on to my children (ok, I try to…I am mostly successful but three-year olds say the darndest things).

So I have this to say to those who think me and people like me odd:  I make all our food from scratch…my children have never eaten a school offered meal in their lives….I fuss over my home….I make soap and candles and all sorts of crafts while my kids are at school….I grow as much of our food as I can on a third of an acre lot in the middle of a city…..I re-create seasons for my kids because where we live seasons don’t really exist…..I am room Mom in both my kids classrooms and volunteer for anything that just needs doing.  I walk my kids to the front door of school instead of dropping them off in the car lane (because I so love that last hug before they leave for the day)….I make my husbands favorite foods as often as I can….I try to never forget to surprise him with something special so he will know how important I think he is…..No matter what time Hubby comes home from work (really late on the weekends) I stay awake and as bright-eyed as I can so he doesn’t have to be all alone after his long day.  I manage my husbands personal schedule so he never has to worry about doctor appointments or family birthdays (he works hard enough).

I have made this house and the people in it the focus of my life.  When I first became a stay at home Mom I struggled to be honest with finding a sense of purpose and fulfillment.  There are no bosses to give me a promotion or a raise.  There are no awards ceremonies or fancy dinners with colleagues….no conventions no fancy suits.  In my case I wore a Chefs uniform but the idea is the same.  What I do have HOWEVER, is a home that makes me smile the moment I come back from where ever I’ve been.  A place where my kids feel special because I have the chance to be at every single event large or small in their lives.

I have never missed one single thing with my kids…not one.  I am able to cook and bake the foods that keep my family happy and healthy with the knowledge that it’s all fresh and as clean as I could get it.  Turning our city home into a slice of the country has become my hobby.  I do have a hobby.  You see my life is my hobby.  I get to do things that I think are important all day every day.  I get to stop right in the middle of the day with a cup of coffee or tea in my hand and sit in my barnyard surrounded by animals that I love and love me.  I get to be there to pick my kids up from school and have them run to me because they missed me and can’t wait to tell me about their day.  I get to be available to my husband….my best friend on earth.  I have the privilege of making him the king here.  Because he rewards my efforts by showing me I am his queen….every single day.

I loved my job when I worked outside our home.  I miss it sometimes too.  Would I trade what I have to go back to my old life?  Not a chance.  Maybe I am odd.  I am just fine with it.  My family is so well.  I am truly happy.  This place fulfills me.  I am in need of nothing more than I have.  NOTHING.

I am so sorry for ranting tonight.  I just reached my limit and had to get that off my chest.  I hope you will forgive me.  I would really love to know what you think.  I value your opinions….more than you know.

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54 Responses to I am told almost daily that I am odd. Am I odd? Are you odd?

  1. Memorie says:

    Take from a mom who works all the time, I envy you and would love to be a stay at home mom. Don’t listen to those other people who try to bring you down because you chose to be with your family and be able to be their homemaker. I have worked since I was the age of 15 years old. I have always wanted to have a wonderful marriage, a house full of kids and be able to stay at home and raise them. Unfortunately, I am a single mother of a wonderfully beautiful little girl that God has blessed me with and I wouldn’t trade her or our life for the world. From a mom who wishes she could stay at home, I am SO HAPPY THAT YOU CAN!!!

    • Tamatha says:

      Children are a gift. I know you have not yet found your perfect mate but don’t think for a moment that he is not out there looking for you too. A person as kind and loving as you will be the perfect catch for a wonderful man who will cherish you and your daughter. I thank you so much for your support. I am humbled by the response I got here. I am deeply thankful. I wish you the best of luck finding exactly what you want.

  2. Alyssa Ozzi says:

    You are “different” in todays disposable society, and that includes people, animals and food. And from one stay at home mom to another I envy you and all you do in a day, I wish I had your drive and energy most days. We will talk further,you know that!, just know yes you may be “odd” by todays standards but those of us who know and love you would have you no other way! My mom always said if everyone in this world were the same, it would be boring….there is no truer statement.

  3. Jann says:

    Obviously I missed the public opinion change that made it “odd” to put your family first! I think the way you refer to your husband and children shows deep love and commitment. That does not make you odd, it makes you special (and not yellow bus special…I too offer sarcasm as a free service!). Anyhoo, I worked the entire time my children were growing up (my ex did not believe in stay home mom status for me. “If I work, YOU work!” Hence the ‘ex” status). During that time I drove myself bat s*** crazy also coaching soccer, leading the Girl Scout troop, being on the PTA and Soccer Boards, Room Mother, etc. Sometimes I felt spread so thin I would be close to a forced rest in a padded room with one of those nice white jackets that buckle in the back. I admire your drive and determination to provide the best home that you can for your family. I would have given my soul to stay home and spend that special time with my children while they were growing up. Keep doing what you are doing, it’s certainly not odd to cherish those close to you…

    • Tamatha says:

      You really made me laugh with your sarcasm as a public service. I needed a laugh. I was feeling a little low. My gosh you keep very very busy. You are very engaged and I have such respect for you being a working Mom but still able to do so much. You must be exhausted. The padded room…sounds like a nice quiet place to rest and maybe read….you think I can come too? :) I’ll bring coffee!

      • Jann says:

        Coffee is always appreciated! My children are now grown (36 and 33) and have children of their own. I was able to retire April 1, 2012 and now am doing more baking (my passion and how I found your amazing blog) and hanging with the grandkids. I truly enjoy having quality time with my granddaughter Taylor (9 going on 19)and the new baby Liam, 8 weeks old. I feel like I have a second chance to do what you so wonderfully do…have the extra time with my children’s children. Liam has colic so I am able to spend some time helping my daughter by cuddling him while she gets a long-awaited shower, watching him while she runs errands, gets a massage (required from cold nights sleeping in a chair with a fussy baby)or has an uninterrupted dinner with her husband. She will be returning to work in January and I will care for the baby while she is at work. Your children are blessed to have you as their mom. When they are older they will tell you how much it meant to them. Odd is in the eye of the beholder and unfortunately, many people think if you don’t do what they do, you’re “odd”. Their loss! I think you rock!

        • Tamatha says:

          Congratulations!!!!!!! How wonderful!!!!! I hope you are having exactly the retirement you dreamed of. It sure sounds like you are. How lucky those grand-babies are to have you. Your daughter is lucky beyond words. She will never have to worry about her sweet little baby. She has the gift of knowing that her baby is in the care of a person who loves him every bit as much as she does. What a wonderful bond you will have!

          The massage sounds amazing….I could use a few of those myself. I know how she is feeling. My little one was like that too. I was awake for months. Best wishes for all your wonderful treasures. What a wonderful story. :)

  4. Corky says:

    Forget what they think. EVERY ONE has an opinion. They just have other priorities. BUT just maybe, they are so jealous of you and the only way they are able to express the resentment in their lives is to put others down, just to make themselves feel better about themselves. You are a special giving person, NOT selfish!! Sad how our society is on such a fast pace. More people need to see the good in other people instead of trying (in their eyes) be better than the people around them. I would love to have you adopt me and take care of me. The world needs more caring people like you.

    • Tamatha says:

      Ok, I’ll adopt you but we keep quite a pace around here….you will be running for the door in a week. I say a week because for that first week I think you would have a ball!!!! Between the food and the barnyard….oh the fun we would have. :) Thank you so much for being so supportive. I was really upset. It means a lot. It really does.

      • Corky says:

        Great, all the kids and I have our bags packed and ready to go. I appreciate all of the great stories and recipes that you blog about. Wish MORE parents would take the time and effort to spend QUALITY time with their kids instead of the family just being trophies for them to parade around. Wonder how much better the world would be if more parents took the time to spend more time and not just money with their families. Sadly we are not in the era of the 50′s and 60′s when life was geared more toward family instead of material possessions. I am proud to be one of your many followers and to read that there are SO MANY people that applaud your efforts. Please continue your great work and do not become jaded by those selfish and nasty people that we share this planet with.

  5. Shannon S. says:

    I know people like that as well and hear their judgment and see it but I try to ignore it as well. You live your life the way you want, they don’t support you or know you so *poof* to them.

    I started reading your blog a couple or so months ago and I can’t remember how I found it but I loved your writing instantly. Hearing about your farm and cooking/baking and children makes me happy! From what I read I envy your life a little since its my dream to have a small piece of land and lots and lots of animals and I love to cook and bake and strive to be as good as you are.

    And I think you are awesome and your family is lucky to have you taking care of them like you do.

    • Tamatha says:

      The support I have gotten from my readers has moved me to tears. I am so very thankful to you. I am so happy you enjoy reading about my tiny farm. I so enjoy sharing it. If you ever have a chance to get your hands on that little piece of land to call your own and need some help getting started, feel free to call on me. I have made every single mistake there it to make.

      I’ve learned from every single one though…and would happily help you skip them. :)

  6. Nancy Villanueva says:

    The devide between stay at home mom’s and working women/mom’s has always caused a devide in our society. Women fought for the right to be treated as equels in a mans world and took a lot of heat for leaving their families at home to “fend for themselves.” I remember when I worked in a predominatly male enviroment, I was accused of being a bad mother and told that I shouldn’t be taking a job away from a man who needs to support his family.

    Well we’ve come a long way since then, but the divide and negitive sentiment lives on. In general people need to justify their decisions and choices. I think that most mothers of young children would love to have the oppurnity to stay home and be a bigger part of their childrens lives, but the bills dictate otherwise.

    I bet those same women who think they are above you because they have their career to keep them stimulated, resent you because they know what they missed to achieve their goal. If you ask those same people if they would have liked to have their mothers home to make their lives special the way you do, they would yes.

    I know you put your career on hold to give your family the best life experience possible. I know how much you loved being a chef and putting your family first is admiral. Those women should take some lessons from your example and try to incorporate a little selflessness in their lives and give their family something to smile about.

    Your children are so lucky to have you as their mom. I love seeing the pride in their faces when you do all those special projects for their school and classrooms and the pride they take in saying, that’s MY MOM.

  7. Oye vey!
    I got the same sort of things raising my kids. And you know, it’s funny. MY kids were the ones that “Their” kids taught to cook, clean and research purchases. Yes, my poor “backwards, homeschooled kids” were the ones teaching self-sufficiency skills to their peers.

    My “babies” are now a 23 year old married daughter with a 3-day old daughter and an 18month old son (who stays at home with them), a 20 year old married son with a 21month old son (and trying to run his FIL’s business despite fil’s bad business choices) and an 18 year old daughter who is still in high school (at dad’s). I have no IDEA how they got this old. It was just YESTERDAY they were at little and at home. I’m SO glad that I was able to be at home with them. To teach them the things that I thought were important. I blinked and they’re adults. I can never get back those years, so I’m glad I was ABLE to be at home with them (there are many women who are NOT able to do this!), and that I made the choice to be at home. yeah, I’ve caught a LOT of flack for my life-style choices. But…I have those sweet memories that you are now making. So many of my friends whom chose to work (not because they HAD to), are now terribly sorry they made that choice. They are full of regrets for the missed opportunities that can never come again.
    It’s a true statement that you’ll never hear someone in their old age or someone on their death bed state;”I wish I had spent more time in the office”. But how many have said; “I wish I had spent more time with my family”? All of the ability to buy whatever they want, whenever they want, the up-scale clothes, fancy restaurants and exotic vacations (while not in and of themselves bad),are not worth missing out on having a family or spending time with your spouse and kids. Stuff gets lost,tossed or decays, but families are forever.

    You’ve made the best choice. It takes sacrifices and devotion to be an at-home mom. A sacrifice that many women (and their husbands!) are not willing to make.

    I know there’s women out there whom would give all they have to be ABLE to stay at home and just CAN’T! To them, don’t beat yourself up. We can only do what we CAN do and then have to just let go of the rest of it.

    • Tamatha says:

      Thank you thank you thank you. You wrote something that I think I will never forget…It’s a true statement that you’ll never hear someone in their old age or someone on their death bed state;”I wish I had spent more time in the office”. But how many have said; “I wish I had spent more time with my family”? I don’t think I have read words more true than those. I will keep them with me. Thank you for that. Your support is so deeply appreciated.

  8. Oh, it’s late. That sentence should read: My kids were the ones that taught “their” kids to cook…

  9. Mary Anne says:

    oh pish posh! Each to his own, I say, but for me I am able to stay home and putter around and take care of my sweet husband and 19 year old daughter. My house is currently a mess with furniture painting projects etc. but I look around and there are so many sweet memories here. Be proud of what you do and have a snappy comeback! Anyway have fun life is too short not doing what your hearts desire is telling you! Carry on! A fellow chicken, dogs owner and stay at home Mom!

    • Tamatha says:

      :) Pish posh indeed. I agree with you!!!! My home is my happy place. I just have no urge to be any where else. I love THIS place. Best wishes with your painting project. I love the end result of big projects….the middle….not so much! We are under construction too….I won’t miss the mess. Thank you so very much.

  10. Lisa says:

    Wow, that is terrible you get so much grief for being a SAHM & putting your family first! I believe our country would be much better off if more moms stayed home & took care of there families. I’m one who thinks it’s sad & senseless to pay a day care to raise YOUR children, the children God has blessed us with. I remember once someone asking me how I did it & if I got bored-ha yeah right! It is the most rewarding things a mom can ever do! I can’t imagine ever missing any of my children’s activities. I say ignore the negative people & continue doing what you know is best for your family.

    • Tamatha says:

      I agree with you. I can’t imagine handing off my children but I do understand why some do as they have no choice. I have been blessed with this opportunity. I simply try and make the most of it. The farm….it brings us joy. It feeds my kids….it makes us happy. I thank you so much for your kindness. It warms my heart. Truly.

  11. Tammy says:

    Hi Tamatha!
    I feel for you! I feel like I need to probably reiturate what others have said – I haven’t read all of the other comments but am suprised to see so many already! :) You are AMAZING!! You are maybe ‘old-fashioned’ compared to how our society has become, but trust me….we could all stand to get closer tothe basics! Treating your family as the most important piece of your life is godly as far as I know. In my opinion this is where it is at…this is what we all should be doing!! I am envious of you. :) I am a working mom – both because of necessity and want – I don’t want to work as hard as you. LOL. To do all that you do and to do it lovingly – I think that that is the most important!!
    I think that women of all ages are too hard on each other. Many are downright mean. Judge, judge, judge….I think the base of it is jealousy. Jealous of something you have that they don’t. I think you handled yourself very well and it’s unfortunate that you have to defend yourself.
    I think it’s remarkable that you find such joy in what you do and I think that that is every woman’s dream. Keep living your dreams….You are perfectly you!
    I am happy for you! Can’t wait to read more and to see pics of the animals – I love them and can’t wait to meet the piggy!
    Sincerely,
    Tammy

    • Tamatha says:

      LOL, At first I found being home to be a real struggle. Then I changed the way I look at it. That’s when I found the joy. I hope you love how you spend your days even if it is different from how I spend mine. You keep very busy from what I have read….you might be the one who should slow down just a bit! I wish we as women could be more supportive of each other. I thank you so much for your support. I cherish it.

      I am so excited about that tiny pig. Keeping in mind I have never lived with a pig and this could be wonderful or a total disaster. You only live once. I can’t wait to share pictures and stories about her with you.

      Warmly,
      Tamatha

  12. Charlotte Moore says:

    People can be so cruel at times. Why does anyone care what we do if that is our choice? Do they pay our bills? Nope! I have worked and I have stayed home. I do wish I could have stayed home when our first son was a baby. I had to go to work when he was 10 months old, but was BLESSED with a wonderful sitter. We quickly became the best of friends and have followed them from Virginia, Florida, and now Augusta, GA just to visit.I know everyone has not been so BLESSED. Later in life I got a job at the school my children attended. I stayed there for over 24 years and retired in 2011. I was home when they were home and got to be at all their events. I was very fortunate GOD allowed me to do that.

    Do not feel bad for all you do for your family. I think a wife and mother should do those things if she can. Yes, they may just be jealous. Must children have no idea what a home cooked meal is.

    I took my bread machine to school one day and made bread for the kindergarten class I worked on. They loved it. They go home and tell their mom all about it. I am famous for the best applesauce in the world. Hahaha!!! We did that every fall and I have been back to school both falls to do it again.

    • Tamatha says:

      Hey!!!! That’s a wonderful idea!!!! You are always so full of great ideas!!!!!! I have a bread machine and never use it. I can bring it to school and bake bread with the kids!!!!!! You are a true treasure!!!! How lucky those children were to have you.

      I completely agree with you about the home cooked meals. My kids have never known anything else. I mean we eat the occasional pizza but more than 90% of the time I cook. They know nothing about convenience foods. I simply don’t even consider them. Why would people judge me for taking the time to do for my family? I don’t spend even a moment judging them for not doing for theirs???

      I have always figured we are different people who are all good at different things. I wish I understood then meanness. Thank you every so much for your care and support. It helps it really does. :)

  13. Lori says:

    Odd? Not really. Different? Maybe.

    I thought the whole point of the women’s movement was to give women the opportunity to choose for themselves. You have done exactly that and, honey, that doesn’t set anybody back 50 years.

    What you’re doing brings joy to your life and stability and love to your family. I think it’s lovely. And who can go wrong with chickens?

    • Tamatha says:

      Thank you so much! I so agree with you. I am not home doing these things against my will. I adore my little world. I wish I understood why the harsh judgments are necessary. Chickens!!!! I can’t imagine not having them. Goats either for that matter. I will have to let you know how it goes with our new micro mini pig. She arrives next weekend!!!! We are excited about it..and a little scared. :)

  14. Janett says:

    You are doing the hardest job in the world, and doing it fantastic! Don’t let anyone bring you down for putting your family first.

  15. silverilex says:

    All of your experiences sound eerily familiar.

    My husband’s family have ever stated that I’m ‘living off’ him as I’m too lazy to go to work, among other charming statements. My being a SAHM is a decision my husband and I made together. He loves having me at home, and I love being a homemaker!

    Once when times were tight, I attempted to work part time. Dreadful! Everyone was unhappy and our home life disintegrated.

    We weren’t even better off financially. My working actually cost us money! Between my self-employed husband juggling his working hours- and losing jobs in the process- to help with childcare, my transportation costs, the convenience meals and the more expensive but time-saving household options (I make a lot of homemade household cleaners, preserves, cupboard mixtures, gifts, etc to save money that I just didn’t have time for when I briefly worked), our expenditures went up! What a blessing for us all when we decided that my working wasn’t financially worth it or a direction we wanted our family life to go in.

    I guess I’m lucky in one respect, since I’m an American living in England, the people here look on my ‘weird’ness and ‘odd’ness as the result of my being American, and steer clear of me in case I contaminate them! LOL

    As a single parent before I married my Englishman, I did the whole career/parent whirlwind. Although I did what I had to do to provide for my older children, I bitterly regret missing so much of their childhood and the negative situations that I unknowingly put them in.

    I have been BLESSED to stay at home with my youngest from birth (except the brief part-time work) with this marriage. I have been told so many times by my children’s friends that they wished that they had a mom at home and doing the little things I do for my 13 year old son.

    For example- what to me is a simple thing like making brownies when my son’s friends come around or to make cookies for one of his activities, to his friends and team mates is viewed by them as an astounding accomplishment and generosity. I’m happy to do it.

    Although, my older children are all adults and haven’t lived at home for years, I still have some of their friends come to see me, or to come up to me in a store or on the street to give me great squishy hugs and greet me with joy. So, even though I’m ‘only a SAHM’, I am giving the gift of good memories not only to my children, but to others as well. I can handle that, and not worry about the negative people and statements.

    I actually feel sorry for the working mothers. They generally act harassed, impatient, look tired and distracted. They generally don’t have a good relationshiop with their children, or their children express to others how much they are unhappy with their lives. They look back on their home lives peppered with statements, ‘I couldn’t be there for my child’s ____ as I was at work.’ What comforts a person more in their old age, memories of loved ones and shared good times, or the accomplishments of pleasing unappreciative employers and strangers. I know which one I’d prefer.

    • Tamatha says:

      WOW!!!! I am so sorry that you are not getting the support that you would really like to have from your husbands family. What is important there is that HE supports you being home and making a lovely home for him and the children. I can imagine the stress that comes with his family responding to you that way brings.

      I feel sorry for the mothers who would rather be home but cannot. The ones who prefer to work I think would be very miserable at home. Being happy helps make a happy home no matter where Mom is I think.

      Being home fils my life with lovely things. I get to see my kids grow and learn. I get to teach them skills that are mostly forgotten these days. I get to create the home of my dreams. I hope when my kids are all grown up they will look back on their childhood with nothing but fondness. Happy kids, happy Hubby and a happy me. That is my goal. I work to that end every day…here at home. :)

      Best of luck with all that you do being a wonderful stay at home mom too. Homemade cookies….they can cure an awful lot of life’s ills. :)

  16. Ali says:

    You are blessed beyond words can say. Are we all not looking fort that ‘thing’ in our lives that gives us purpose and fills our hearts with love. You dear have and your cup runith over! With your extra surplus you give generously. Dear friend you are in the the middle of SoFlo…where bling has a higher value than true love, faithfulness and wholesomeness. Dear friend…our state (and Specifically our tri-county area) was the only state in YELLOW for a reason. Most of us only wish to find who we are and do what we love….for those who are searching OUT there and are searching…are not quite certain what to make of you…however it is clear something about you living a full abundant life…triggers their own insecurities enough to reflect back to them what they are lacking, including a hobby. Ask them what their hobby is. By the way …that was the funnest…you need to get a hobby.

    Dear friend…I have so much admiration for you, I get such joy in reading your posts and I know it is all so true…other readers…The love shared in Tamatha’s household is a love we all long for and a love found in the movies.

    Again, you are blessed beyond words, and if that is ODD well friend than ODD we all long to be.

    Love to you – Your friendly long lost neighbor and friend sort up the street.

    • Tamatha says:

      Oh Ali, you just made me cry!!!! How sweet you are! I am so lucky to have such wonderful friends. I really am. Thank you so very much from the bottom of my heart. Those words mean the world to me.

  17. Ali says:

    One other comment…I don’t think this is entirely about being a SAHM or a working mom, which in itself an absurd conversation …we are all moms wanting the same thing …the best for our family. Since I live in the same town Tamatha does… I can see what and where this is coming from…we live in a town that values bling way more than nurturing one’s hearth and family values first. What is odd about you Tamatha is the true essence of creating ‘home’ from it true foundation. As a culture, we have learned not to value this as much as the other. This is about our society that has become a commercialized fast food nation. There is something for everyone…go figure there are folks watching The Real House Wives (Which I have never watched). I don’t watch much TV, yet if there was a show about an urban farm making the most of what we have …and how to do it…giving love, being the love we all long for with our family now that is something I would watch…yet not as popular…thank G-d our society has a channel for everything today. You are just a bit out of place here in SoFlo and in my book a breath of fresh air and a well received reflection for me of what I would long for. To me my friend you are someone I admire and think of as a small town hero working on her urban farm, you are one lucky duck, or is that one lucky chief in her own little castle with her prince.

    • Tamatha says:

      I know you are right. South Florida is not the warmest place in the world. We do have an awful lot of people who strive for things that hold very little interest for me. Creating this home takes me all day every day but I love almost every minute of it ( I am human after all). I would love to have a show about this life. If there was one I would watch it too! Maybe I will make one…you never know. Did you see the post about the micro mini pig that is coming to live with us? Will you come and see her?

      What’s a farm without a pig? Ok, this pig is tiny but it’s still a pig! Your support is so valued. Please know that. Visit me soon. I miss you.

  18. Darlene says:

    I know how hurtful those comments have to be! But,please don’t let them change you at all!!! Your readers love you and your style of writing and if you are “odd”….then you have a lot of “odd” friends!!!
    People who are jealous and unhappy are the ones to strike out at others.Try to remember that when they make a comment,it is about them and not you.It only feels like it is about you.Try real hard to let it slide off your back and not affect you!!
    And then,tell them that you did not ask them for their opinion!!!!!

  19. rett says:

    I for one think you are an awesome woman. I was just thinking the other day “what if she ever decided to quit doing her blogs?” I would be so upset, because I so love all your recipes (except the pork ones, lol) and I love hearing about your home life, it gives me a chuckle and I feel not so alone in my chaotic world. Keep on being who you are, we love you that way! blessings to you!

  20. Susan says:

    I agree with Lori! And, we’re not in the Victorian Age where rules were written for how women should act…we’ve come a long way baby! My mother always told me, “you’re the only one you have to impress!” Words I live by and who cares if people think I’m odd for putting my family first, loving housework (especially ironing!!), and baking from scratch! I’m a respectful, generous, kind, considerate, and appreciative woman–that’s all that counts, XOXO

  21. Kendra says:

    Congratulations! You are apart of the “weird, self-sufficient people”! It’s worse when you are a “weird, HOMESCHOOLED, self-sufficient person”.

  22. Carole says:

    Personally, I think everything you do is great – if it works for you and makes you happy, what do you care what other people think or say? Because I found myself a single Mom when my daughter was 3 years old, I HAD to go to work … I resented not being home for her, doing the things I wanted to do. However, she’s 43 now…I still make bread every week, I do my own houswork, I line-dry my clothes and iron everything. I guess I’m odd, too!! Kudos to you, girl.

  23. Mary Reidy says:

    Awesome! I was a stay-at-home Mom while my three kids were little–until the oldest was 16. Like you, it was hard at first and then I relished it. Now that one is out of college and two are still in, I have been back to work for over 8 years. I continue to make the best home I can for my family. And, it is very hard at times and I am faced with much prejudice in the workforce because of it. I gave up a lot in the ladder-climbing arena and just yesterday heard a co-worker who had always worked full-time, say another co-worker did not deserve an upgraded position because she was only in the workplace for four years following a stay-at-home stint!

    So, go! You are not odd! You are a treasure and your family is lucky. Thanks for the rant! I love your blog and the recipes.

  24. Erica says:

    What you are is Amazing! Be happy, be yourself. Don’t listen to the nay-sayers.

  25. Vickie Noble says:

    I love your blog because it hits home with me. When I was first married with no children I continued what I had been taught by my Mom and Grandma. People didn’t get it! Why would I can food when there was just the two of us? Does “just two of us” make us not worth an effort to provide the best for our family. When my daughter was born I was blessed to be able to stay at home with her, we did homeschooling for some of her school years. Today she is a confident well adjusted woman. We cook,bake and preserve our own food. We have been told we are not normal! All I can say is read Proverbs 31 and you will see the Bible says women like you and your readers are praised. Keep living the good life and don’t worry about what others think or say.

  26. Mark says:

    WOO DOGGIES, Mrs. S-A-H Queen of the Oddie Moms…that was one heckuva SOFLO rant!!!
    Sounds like someone, or several someones, really got your um, well… goat! HA!

    But seriously, kiddo, you know how ignorant, cruel and small minded people can be. I’m positive that you will quickly move on from these diversions and continue to be true to yourself, family, friends and blog followers who are the only ones that really count in this world.
    Don’t change a thing you’re doing or a thought you’re thinking, lady ..you’re far more interesting and inspiring than most people could ever hope, or dare, to be.

    • Tamatha says:

      I really did….I think I may have had a bit of a fit. Sorry about that. I was just really so frustrated with this meanness. I never imagined I would find so much support for what I do. Thank you so very much! Why wait until spring? Winter in Florida is the best!!!!! Come down soon. :)

  27. Debra says:

    I want to be a stay at home Mom/Wife. Things just didn’t work out that way for us. I admire you for what you do. I say go girl, go! ((hugs))

  28. valerie says:

    Take advantage of the gift thatyour husband has given you, the choice tobe a stay at home mom, so many of us wishwe werw in your shoes. Many blessings on your home and family.

    • Tamatha says:

      I really do appreciate this gift. I know how special it is. I love this life and would never trade it. If this life is something you want…I hope you will be able to have your wish someday soon. Thank you so very much, truly.

  29. VCK says:

    First of all, and I apologize if I am the first one to say it but… you ARE odd! And the really hard part that you might want to start bracing yourself to accept is that you are raising odd children. Let me explain: I’m a bit further on the Mom-track with 3 of my 4 children in college. Not a day goes by that one of them doesn’t text me a question such as “what’s Wonder Bread? My friedns couldn’t believe I’ve never had any!” or they have shown up at dinner time with friends who have never experienced a family dinner. My daughter once changed the flat tire on her boyfriends car because he didn’t know how. My son taught his roommates how to do laundry. My daughter brought a bunch of her friends over for pizza night (we made the dough, the sauce AND the cheese from scratch) and they were amazed that you could make it at home – they thought it HAD to be bought! My teenage daughter brought her friends over to PROVE that eggs come from chickens not stores. It goes on and on.

    Right now, your girls are young enough that they accept your life as normal. But the day will come when they will discover how few of their friends have ever had a homecooked meal or sat down and had a family meal or have the slightest clue about how to clean up after them selves (“You don’t have a maid??!!”) or do laundry (“Your Mom is putting all your stuff in the big white metal box, are you getting all new clothes?”) or take care of themselves on the most basic level (during Hurricane Sandy our phones never stopped buzzing with kids calling because the power/cable/internet was out and they were in a state of panic!). Unfortunately, your kids will be the odd ones because they don’t panic at the simple things and can handle most of the tough things. It’s a sad commentary on the state of our world.

    So, I am sorry to say this, but you need to accept that you are odd and so are your children and even your husband. (Ask him! I’m sure he will tell you that most of his co-workers are amazed beyond words that he goes home to a home-cooked meal!) You need to accept that you are raising healthy, happy, self-sufficient, self-confident, well-balanced, educated children in a world where that is a rarity.

    • Tamatha says:

      Dear God!!!! What is this world coming to. I get the same looks with all my homemade “stuff”. Like if I have lost my mind. The truth is I feel it is my job to make sure my kids can cook and bake and know how to keep a house. Even if they hit the lottery they need to know these things. I feel a great sense of comfort in the fact that I can just whip up loaves of bread…cakes…pies….dinner after dinner. I can grow my own food and actually enjoy it.

      I think not knowing how to look after myself and my family would make me feel very vulnerable. I really don’t like that feeling. I love that you so understand where I’m coming from.

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